Help with Ending 'Bedtime Battles'
Lori Warner, Ph.D., HOPE Center, Beaumont Center for Human Development, provides tips on ending bedtime battles.
Q: My 6-year-old son used to be a great sleeper. Since he started school, he says he needs an extra drink of water or that he is scared of monsters in his closet. He will not sleep unless I lie down with him.
A: It's not uncommon for even the best sleepers to have trouble when routines change or big events are on the horizon. Many parents report that the holidays also wreak havoc with bedtimes. For most children, a little extra reassurance is all they need. It's best to prepare children for any change in routine.
For school, let children know it's fine to be a little nervous and that (big secret!) many other kids are nervous too. This alone may help. If the fears persist, you may need to stay with him to help him feel calmer. But, each night you leave a little earlier so that eventually you are back to your regular routine. There is no one "right" solution so you may need to brainstorm a little to see what works best.
Q: My daughter is 18 months old and still wakes up every night! She is not hungry and usually not wet, but she cries and cries unless I rock her back to sleep.
A: I know how hard it is to "wait it out" when a child is screaming at 1 a.m. But, it may be where you need to start.
To end the crying, you need to change your reaction to the crying. Your daughter knows that her cries immediately summon mom and dad! Be prepared, the crying may get worse before it gets better.
Typically, families find that the crying is longest the first night and then begins to decrease. If you have followed the plan for several days and the crying has not decreased, you may want to check with your physician to ensure there is nothing physically affecting her sleep.
Q: My 4-year-old is an absolute MONSTER to get to bed. He still naps most days and has so much energy at night that we can't get him into bed until very late. What can we do?
A: First, consider decreasing or phasing out nap time. You may also review your son's sleep routine. The activities that precede going to bed, and environmental factors, can interfere with sleep. Having your son avoid activities such as watching television or eating sugary foods just before bedtime may also help you get him to sleep.
Dr. Warner earned her BA at Western Michigan University and her PhD in clinical psychology from Wayne State University. She has trained at Children's Hospital of Michigan and has been with Beaumont since 2000. She is a fully licensed psychologist and a doctoral-level Board Certified Behavior Analyst. In addition to her work at Beaumont, Dr. Warner teaches an introductory course in Applied Behavior Analysis at Oakland University through the Psychology Department, and is part of Beaumont's Parenting Program, serving as a guest speaker on a variety of topics relevant to new parents. She also speaks frequently in the community about parenting issues, behavioral treatment of childhood problems, and autism. Dr. Lori Warner is a Licensed Psychologist and Director of the HOPE Center, Center for Human Development at William Beaumont Hospital in Berkley. She can be reached at (248) 691-4774. Visit their Web site @ www.beaumonthospitals.com/hope. Dr. Warner serves on the Advisory Council for The Family Center.
The HOPE Center is a member of The Family Center's Association of Professionals.
Save The Date
'Bedtime Battles'
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
6:30-8:30pm Presentation followed by Q&A session
Assumption Nursery School, 22150 Marter Rd. St. Clair Shores 48080
No Fee
RSVP by March 17, 2011
Register online at www.familycenterweb.org or contact The Family Center, 313.432.3832.
Download the Ask The Experts March 2011 Series flier with all presentations...
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